I have been in therapy for 1 year, and the causes of my bipolar disorder and mild eating disorders are due to domestic violence, long-term emotional blackmail by family members, and abusive words.

At first, I go to therapy when I fall into depression, I almost cried and said that my father would beat me, I was so scared, I was useless. The therapist recreated the situation of my father and king, told me to kneel (I was beaten on my knees before), and told me softly that it was not my fault, and I did not need to blame myself. I have always questioned my worth and didn't believe that I have the right to be loved, so at that time I filled my boring heart with schoolwork, work and clubs. My therapist told me that I don't need to rush to do a lot of things to prove that I will be loved or that I am good, and try to calm down and listen to my inner voice. My therapist is a very gentle person, she will see through my defense and guide me to speak the most truthful words.

Fast-forward to the first half year, and I gradually became more confident and understood my needs and feelings better. But my family's emotional blackmail is still very serious, and I can't help but fall into conflicting emotions. Should I move out or force myself to stay in this cage that imprisoned me? I reached out to my therapist outside of our session hours, she scheduled a family therapy session. During that session, my auditory hallucinations and hand tremors were accompanied by my intense emotions. The therapist observed our conversation and provided suggestions for our communication. First, don’t use double messages (for example: you can eat late at night, but how can I trust that you will be self-disciplined ---> Suggest to change to "Do you want to consider whether to eat late at night?") Also, in order to prevent me from feeling untrustworthy, use care instead of worry. After that, I felt less emotionally blackmailed, and my relationship with my parents gradually improved.

Lastly, even though my physical and mental illnesses once made me feel hopeless. Questions such as whether I can't live a good life and why me are rushing into my mind like a storm. However, I like who I am now, who is trying to live with my bipolar disorder. During my seizures, I always believed that this state was temporary and would get better. Don't treat temporary emotions as permanent states.

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What is your therapy platform?

1-to-1 in-person

How did you feel before therapy?

Sometimes acting impulsively, sometimes falling into a 2 week depression, unable to go out, yelling, over-eating when the stress hits.

What did you feel the therapist do that helped you?

Don't try to be the perfect self, that's impossible, no one is perfect; when you have emotional ups and downs, first think about why you are angry, sad, and resentful. If you cry, let your emotions release. Crying and laughing are equal, there is no positive or negative; you have to have your own time to take a breath before moving on.

How much did you pay for therapy?

USD 56 (NTD. 1700)

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My therapy journey has just begun.

I graduated from a related department of helping people and engaged in helping people, so I have maintained a relatively open mind and a little background in psychotherapy. Talking about it with friends and colleagues, I don't feel ashamed or hide it deliberately, because I think it's normal to "seek professional help because of need".

I had a car accident the year before last and injured my brain. This accident almost killed me, and I still suffer from the sequelae. In addition to fighting for damages and trying to rehab, I was also very depressed, easily scared and hopeless for the future. I had PTSD.

In the early days, I mainly focused on medical treatment and medication, and recently I started consultations. I can explore myself through this channel and live with the current state. I feel very comfortable.

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What is your therapy platform?

1-to-1 in-person

How did you feel before therapy?

After the car accident, I was generally depressed and became more numb, but my emotional ups and downs were greater than before. For example, if a car on the road is close to me, my legs may become weak, my mind will go blank, and my heartbeat will be so fast that it is difficult to calm down. In life, it is also easier to be frightened and made to cry.

I will keep thinking about the process of the car accident, the details of rehabilitation, etc. There are many times every day that memories related to the car accident will flash into my mind.

I'd start to worry a lot about the future and feel like it's not going to get any better. For example, I think that no one will love me anymore, that I am inferior, that I cannot do complicated work because of my brain injury.

What did you feel the therapist do that helped you?

The therapist will talk to me about my state of mind after the car accident. That kind of in-depth understanding and dialogue is one of the few in-depth talks that can relax me after I encountered this accident.

In order to return to work, I have put in a lot of effort. In addition, my brain was injured in a car accident. My memory and ability to deal with things are not as fine as before, and I often make mistakes. It is actually hard for people around me to imagine the pain of being helpless, and so my efforts are often just forgotten.

But the therapist will collect relevant knowledge before the consultation, listen patiently to my mental journey and give me a sincere response during the consultation, which relieves my uncomfortable emotions.

In addition, the therapist will also assist me to find a suitable working method for me and discuss different contingency methods with me. I think this has given me a clearer and more practical direction of action.

How much did you pay for therapy?

$ Free

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If you encounter similar situations and wish to get in touch with this therapist, or want to give the author anonymous feedback and encouragement, you can pay $5 to unlock our peer support. Part of this money will go to the author as token of appreciation and fund their next therapy session. Rest of the money will help run this website.

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Some long-term strange things in the workplace, love issues, and the hard-to-read scriptures of the native family. At some point it suddenly exploded! Even though I try my best, with all the decisions I made one after another, these knots are tied and can no longer be seen clearly.

Around March 2022, I turned to my friend who started a career consulting business. I look forward to some friends who have achieved a little success in their careers to guide me in some directions, so that I, who is confused, will know how to adjust my future direction and goals. I don't know that during this consultation, I seemed to be directly beaten to the ground. Maybe I am too fragile at the time, I can only hear accusations from the consultation. I feel that my challenges and efforts have not been seen, and my wounds have been cut open and left untreated. The anger and grievance made me burst into tears, and I secretly made up my mind to start psychotherapy.

I found this amazing thing when I got in touch with therapy, it let me know that I would not be alone. As long as I am willing, there will be someone sitting quietly beside me, listening to me, catching me gently, giving me feedback, and accompanying me to understand my emotions. This allows me to have more stability in the face of unknown fears.

Therapy has really stabilized me. I know that all changes are because I am willing to think and act bravely. How rare and difficult this kind of listening is! The therapist did not intervene in my life, but it changed some of my endless loop behaviors. It is highly recommended for people who feel that they are often trapped. Maybe you only need a kind of companionship, and you can instantly recover your energy and fight more battles.

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What is your therapy platform?

1-to-1 in-person

How did you feel before therapy?

I only know that the work pressure is high, and I will often vent my anger on those close to me. I have obvious shoulder and neck stiffness, and I also find that I have neglected my previous leisure interests. With remote work, the lines between vacation and work are blurring.

What did you feel the therapist do that helped you?

My feelings matter most. Especially when you are worried or anxious about the eyes of others, you should remind yourself.

What about me? how i think and why.

How much did you pay for therapy?

USD 73 (NTD. 2200)

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If you encounter similar situations and wish to get in touch with this therapist, or want to give the author anonymous feedback and encouragement, you can pay $5 to unlock our peer support. Part of this money will go to the author as token of appreciation and fund their next therapy session. Rest of the money will help run this website.

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After getting married and having children, I realized that I actually have a very high standard of living that I want to achieve. However, because I made all the choices myself (I wanted to get married and have children more than my husband did), and because my husband is a very good father (we might split childcare duties 60-40), I feel like I can't complain to anyone even if I regret my choices. Ultimately, it's because I didn't see myself clearly earlier, and I didn't have the courage to make different choices at every turning point.

Also, because my husband and I went through the process of "marriage or breakup", we should have split up but I couldn't leave and ended up getting married, so I find it difficult to complain to my friends. It's easy to complain about a boyfriend, but complaining for a while and then getting married and having children makes me feel like if I complain again, others will just say "I told you so."

Divorce or quitting my job wouldn't help me, because what's making me unhappy is "this isn't the life I want." If we separate, the economic pressure of having a mortgage and children will only make our quality of life worse.

As economic pressure increases, I can only save so much, and due to career restrictions and lack of skills, I can't increase my income. You may suggest changing jobs to increase my income, but I wish I had accepted the job offer that my professor introduced to me right after I graduated, instead of working for the government, where the opportunity cost is so high, and the salary is barely enough to survive. I can't even work a part-time job, which makes it much harder to switch careers.

Should I go on a trip? But the freedom and happiness of getting away will only increase my desire to leave everything behind.

In short, the endless regret is completely powerless to change, making me feel trapped. Whenever I see others' happy photos of their successful jobs, fancy restaurants, or traveling as a couple on social media, I wonder why I'm here. I wish I could go back to those moments of life, and choose a different career, a different partner.

I've thought more than once about ending my life. I know I won't really do it, but I just wish there was a way to escape this misery. I don't really want to die, and I won't really die, I just want to stop being in pain. I really wish I could start over somewhere else. That bitter feeling is really palpable.

I actually received free therapy in college and knew the benefits of therapy. But once I entered society, I thought it was too expensive, and finding a good therapist is like finding a needle in a haystack. Both time and money are burdens for me, especially since I have a newborn at home. Besides, I feel like I already have many tools that my therapist taught me before, and I already read a lot about this, so I have always wanted to save myself.

However, ultimately, that feeling of being trapped overwhelmed me. So I asked around everywhere, and in the end, through a stroke of luck, I was very fortunate to avoid the initial trial and error process and find the therapist that I had liked before.

I like the rhythm in the therapy room and the questions she asks me. She always asks questions that make me think for a long time and rethink things. She also gives me many new perspectives on looking at myself, I needed it so much.

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What is your therapy platform?

1-to-1 in-person

How did you feel before therapy?

I feel unmotivated and bored about everything. I’m always tired and whenever I have time, I just want to sleep. Even when playing with my child, I often just lie down lazily on the floor. Although I am aware of the changes in my body shape and have concerns about a family history of diabetes, I cannot resist the temptation to eat sweets, starch, and drink coffee. I think that these are the only things in my life that can make me feel happy without causing a financial burden.

What did you feel the therapist do that helped you?

Just the feeling that there is a place to go can make you feel a lot better.

In the stagnant and helpless state of life, whatever new things and feelings that enters, and having someone who you know can help you, and will help you, is a powerful thing on its own. 

One time, my therapist apologized for interrupting me because she knew my time and money were precious. I thought “Of course!” Because that’s exactly why I’m here, for intervention.

Regarding the frequency of my therapy sessions, I am not sure if this is the norm, but I can decide how often I want to attend therapy. It's not regular, like every week or every month, but instead, it's whenever I feel the need to talk to my therapist.

This reduces pressure to go to therapy. Because time and money are a scarcity for me, I have to ask my husband to take care of our child before going to therapy, which creates pressure on me. I also struggle with the cost of therapy, which may not affect my short-term living, but still requires a considerable amount of money.

The freedom is something that my therapist has given me.

Can therapy take you to a new place?

Even when all the objective conditions are the same, I am still trapped in a loveless marriage and a dead-end job, but with the help of therapy, I have some moments when I can come up for air and breathe.

There are even some glimpse of moments, where I can call happiness.

How much did you pay for therapy?

USD 98 (NTD. 3,000)

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If you encounter similar situations and wish to get in touch with this therapist, or want to give the author anonymous feedback and encouragement, you can pay $5 to unlock our peer support. Part of this money will go to the author as token of appreciation and fund their next therapy session. Rest of the money will help run this website.

Unlock this therapist: bit.ly/GoPeers